When asked about the life I've lived, I tend to tell folks that I'm a pretty boring individual, and compared to many folks that I view as my contemporaries, this is absolutely true. I haven't authored any books, I haven't been on grand adventures, I'm not a movie star. I'm a forklift driver in a factory that I've worked at for over twenty years now. This is an accurate statement, yet it is also a gross oversimplification of what my time on this planet entails.
I've been a soldier, and served as a peacekeeper in Haiti (this was back in 1995). I've been an artist. I've been a writer. Despite never having been published, I HAVE done those things (just not very well.. I'm too impatient for my 10k hours). I'm a husband and a father, again with questionable results. I've been a public speaker, I've been a quality control inspector, I've been corporate security, a security technician, a salesman, customer service, a thief, a storyteller, an actor, a singer (poorly!), a stuntman, a videographer, a photographer.... the point is, despite my boring life, I've dabbled in a bunch of stuff, and while I'm not an expert in any one thing, I've accumulated a fair range of knowledge, enough so to be able to hold conversations on any number of things.
It's difficult for me to stay focused on any project for too terribly long. I get bored easily, I get distracted easily, and especially with creative endeavors, once I figure out my end point, whether it's a piece of art, or a story, or a minicomic, my mind tends to think that the job is complete, regardless of the actual physical proof that has or has not been created in the interim. Once a job is complete, of course, why linger on it?
My brain, y'all.
One other thing that I am, in my core, at my heart, is an entertainer. I LOVE to entertain folks, whether through a funny story, an in-depth, multi-year tabletop gaming campaign, or playing a role on stage or film. There is a thrill that comes from doing a thing that makes people react emotionally, and I love it. Which, when you think about it, is really weird for a guy who pretty much doesn't like most people (another gross oversimplification, but for the sake of pragmatism, it's accurate enough) (I also really love parenthetical comments, because again... my brain.) (and ellipses... because why not).
So, we're now at the point in my narrative where we hopefully discover the point of my rambling. I've done a bunch of stuff, but I have difficulty sticking with any one creative endeavor, However, I do have a desire, a drive, to entertain people. Is there a way to develop a transitive link between the stuff I do, and my drive to perform, that will grant some sort of sticktoitiveness if for no other sake than to be able to prance around, arms outstretched, asking if you are not, indeed, entertained?
No worries, I know I can't fill out a leather harness the way Russel Crowe could, and I'm not gonna try.
Presently, I'm running a Star Wars rpg for my gaming group (the blog title did warn you I was a nerd, yeah?), and something I've been obsessed with for a couple of years now is developing some sort of cinematic trailer for a game I'm running. I have, in the past, created CG artwork for my players, to help visualize characters, settings, or overall mood for a game, and it is something I enjoy doing. So, it would make sense to try and extend those skills into animation, in order to eventually achieve the "dream" of creating a trailer for a game that my friends can sit back and watch, and say, "well yeah, that's the type of movie I wanna see, and I'm playing it!" Or, you know, something to that effect. The rub comes from the fact that in order to do this, in order to see this vision come to fruition, I've got to learn a whole BUNCH of new skills.
I have mentioned I'm impatient, right?
I really do want to develop these skills, though. I want to create these things, I want folks to see what I've made and say, "Okay yeah, that's kinda cool." I have no illusions, I'm not gonna be the next James Cameron or some new guru at ILM, anything like that. I just want to be some middle aged dude who makes things that make his buddies go, "oh, cool." But, in order to do that, I gotta learn and practice. I've got to make that journey to.. eh, something.
That's where this blog comes in. I want to chronicle my steps and progress. I want to turn my quest to acquire a certain set of skills into something that might illuminate and educate. My self-education, perhaps, will become performance. Or something.
I'm still hammering out the details in my head on how I'm going to approach all of this. In the meantime, this blog will serve as a way for me to geek out over my ideas, my tribulations, and also share my trials and fumbles so that anyone who reads this, and is interested, might be able to avoid those same mistakes. With any luck, my desire to perform for you will give me the impetus to learn these skills and create these things, so that you will, indeed, be further entertained.
Yeah... that's actually a pretty accurate example of how my brain configures itself. Insert shrug emoji here.
